EP 345: What I Wish I Would Have Done Differently with My Births as a Birth Worker

As Liz's oldest child celebrates their big 4th birthday this week (cue the confetti and cake!), she’s found herself reflecting on her past births—and let’s just say, hindsight really is 20/20. If anyone knows the value of experience, it’s Liz, who’s not only a mama but also a doula, constantly learning and evolving in her practice.

With each year that passes, Liz has gained new insights into childbirth that have completely shifted her perspective. So, in honor of her little one turning 4 (where did the time go?!), let’s take a fun little trip down memory lane and dive into what Liz would do differently in her own births now that she has all that wisdom.

First up: trusting her intuition more. As a doula, Liz is all about encouraging others to listen to their bodies during labor and birth. But when she was in the thick of it herself, she realized just how easy it is to get caught up in the noise.

Whether it’s well-meaning advice from friends and family or the pressure of medical protocols, Liz says she could have really used a reminder to tune in to herself and trust her gut. Now, as a doula, she encourages her clients to honor that inner voice—the one that knows what feels right—especially during the chaotic moments of labor.

Next on her list: keeping things more low-key. Birth is a big deal, obviously, but Liz now knows that less is often more. Her first birth was filled with excitement (and a little bit of nervousness), which led to some unnecessary stress and overthinking.

In hindsight, Liz says she would have dialed down the intensity of her own expectations, taking it more moment by moment instead of trying to control everything. Now, with her doula hat on, Liz always advocates for creating a calm, supportive environment during labor, where mamas feel empowered and unhurried. That way, the experience is more about being in the moment and less about sticking to a rigid plan.

And let’s not forget self-care. Back when Liz was a first-time mom, she wasn’t quite as focused on her own well-being as she is now. There was so much focus on the baby, on the birth, and on the whirlwind of newness that came with it. But as Liz learned the hard way (hello, exhaustion!), she wishes she’d given herself more time to rest and recharge during the postpartum period.

Now, as a doula, Liz preaches the importance of building in some self-care and asking for help after birth. “You can’t pour from an empty cup,” she says, and she’s absolutely right!

One of the biggest lessons Liz has learned? Flexibility is key. No matter how many birth plans you make or how much you prepare, things are going to go differently than expected—and that’s okay! Liz reflects on how she might have been a little too attached to a specific birth outcome in her earlier births. But now, with years of doula work under her belt, she knows that flexibility is essential.

Birth isn’t a linear process, and the ability to go with the flow—whether that means changes in position, unexpected interventions, or just a change in mindset—can make all the difference in feeling empowered and in control.

So, as her firstborn turns 4 and Liz looks back on her past births, it’s clear that every experience has shaped her into the loving, intuitive, and knowledgeable doula (and mama) she is today. She’s learned the value of self-compassion, flexibility, and trusting the process.

And with all that wisdom under her belt, she’s excited to continue helping others navigate their own beautiful birth journeys—while still giving herself the grace to grow and evolve along the way.